Your resolutions should make you happy!
December 31st 2011 22:21
I love resolutions so much that they're the cornerstone of my "happiness project" — experiments I make in everyday life, as I test-drive the wisdom of the ages, current scientific studies and pop culture lessons about how to be happier.
I learned the hard way to make resolutions concrete. "Have more fun with my family" is too vague to measure; it's easier to hold yourself accountable if you resolve to "show up." And keep resolutions manageable. Instead of tackling all my digital photos in a single afternoon, I "suffer for 15 minutes," day after day, until I finish.
It's also helpful to think of resolutions that bring feeling good into your life: more joy, enthusiasm, energy. Or resolutions that ease feeling bad: less anger, guilt, boredom.
Consider …
Go outside.
Science suggests sunlight triggers brain chemicals to lift your mood and energy level; for an extra jolt, get your sunshine first thing in the morning.
Read manuals.
Irons, TVs and washing machines have become humiliatingly challenging. One day, as I was cursing a new camera, I finally admitted that I contributed to my frustration: I never read the manual. Now, when I get a new device, I take a minute to actually to read the instructions. It helps. A lot.
Have holiday breakfasts.
Major holidays are a lot of fun — and work. For good cheer without much hassle, we celebrate "holiday breakfasts" for minor holidays like Valentine's Day or St. Patrick's Day. Decorations, goofy paper plates and a little food coloring make ordinary mornings festive.
Sniff.
It's a cliché to vow to "Stop to smell the roses," but it's true: A good smell boosts happiness. Studies suggest a pleasant odor can relieve anxiety and increase pain tolerance. Take a moment to enjoy the scent of a grapefruit or towels fresh from the dryer.
Don't "treat" yourself.
In the long run, will that extra brownie, glass of wine or impulse purchase make you feel better — or worse? Think of a guilt-free "treat." For instance, I save one of my favorite perfumes to use as a special treat when I feel blue.
Imitate a spiritual master.
First, identify your spiritual master, whether a great figure from history, a person you know or even a fictional character, and next, study his or her teachings. Then comes the challenging part: figuring out how to translate the values and aims of your spiritual master into your own daily life. My spiritual master? St. Thérèse of Lisieux, the "Little Flower," because of her emphasis on showing great love through the little, ordinary actions of everyday life.
Abandon a frustrating project.
The quickest, easiest way to finish a project that has been hanging over your head is to abandon it. Instead of feeling guilty every time you look at that half-knit blanket, just admit you're never going to finish, give the yarn to someone who will use it and let yourself move on to a new, more enticing project.
Jump.
Resolve that the next time you feel overwhelmed or exhausted, you'll jump up and down a few times. When I run down the stairs, do morning jumping jacks or skip on the street (to my daughters' utter embarrassment), I get a quick hit of energy and cheer. Feeling silly is part of the fun.
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